as a child, 

        by david huebner
      
as a child
i knew nothing of this world, of this time, 
of this beast called reality
or this machine called capitolism.
        The earth was the dirt 
        between my toes
        in the cracks of the sidewalk
        and the munge in the seams of the bus seats 
        taking me to school 
        where it all became science math english and history
        and we forgot freedom and bliss 
with the bells and chalkboards of the institution. 

as a child
i knew everything
        of that butterfly with the orange wings
        I found on a warm Sunday after planting flowers
        on the deck with mom ‹ of that special rain
        that fell over there but not here.


as a child
i knew very important things that mattered deeply. 
i cried a lot. 

as a child
I thought the world was a perfect order
of morality delivered by parents 
handed down by society in an amazing system 
"not always fair"...

as a child
i knew nothing of acid rain, 
or nuclear waste, 
starvation or HIV, 
war or peace.
I never learned that very powerful people are running the world
keeping its engine greased, and its fuel in good supply
by cutting our trees, polluting our waters, 
fouling our air, 
and strangling the opposition
deesperately screaming at
That these people who make millions 
providing fodder to the capitolist engine,
the multi-national corporate device,
the global terrorism of American Democracy.

as a child
I never knew the friend of my enemy was my friend 
I just shared my lunch
with the good people, 
leaving the punches, the fights, the lunch money
to those with the hand or the fist, 
or the glove on the trigger of the gun that kills for it, 
that bombs for it, that buries for it
that survives off the ground down,
the silenced like King and Kennedy, 
Peltier and Bari, 
swift and foul as an urban river, or a light crude oil,
the cover up runs down the drains of the White House, 
burns in the engines of capitolism, 
and keeps the TVs broadcasting the president live on a ranch in Texas 
while cities explode and children starve to death.

as a child
i never knew
we are mice being fed, 
and given mazes, 
being diseased, 
and then cured, 
being drugged into thinking that we're happy. 

as a child
the world said everything's going to be alright 
as an adult
i realize that it's not. 
I am hearing voices silent that should be screaming,
seeing Televisions smiling that should be crying and bleeding, 
politicians agreeing when they should be fighting,
a country going to war when it should be striving 
        for peace.
      
as a child 
I wished I was an adult. 
as an adult
I wish I were a child.

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